Flames From The Hope Of A Child
by nebula2
Summary: Six months have passed since the fall of the colonies and two groups of survivors are both struggling for survival. Hope of their lot ever changing is dwindling in both groups but when their paths cross by chance, things begin to change, and igniting the kindling is one little girl with ties to both groups
1. Two Landings, Two Different Results

_Disclaimer: The characters of Battlestar Galatica do not belong to me. I'm simply borrowing them for my own amusement and hopefully a few others._

**_AN: Okay, so I decided to take a stab at a multi-chapter story and introducing some OC's. Not sure how this is going to go over but I'm hoping people will give it a chance. The story picks up after the "Resurrection Ship" episodes in the second season. I haven't watched too many more episodes after that but until then the events in the show hold true._**

* * *

"Viper 8567, we've got your landing solution. Pisus now has the ball."

"Copy that Pisus. You have the ball," Phoenix replied, flipping the switch to turn the Viper Mark V controls over to the landing computer of the Valkyrie class battlestar she was approaching. Though no longer in control of her craft, Phoenix kept her hand poised over the controls, ready to resume control should the autolanding sequence fail, as unlikely as that was to occur. She knew many pilots tended to relax at this point, but she never had been able to. Perhaps it was because being a programmer herself, she knew a program was only as good as the people who implemented it, and they were all humans. Errors occurred, no many how many checks and failsafes were put into place.

As soon as the maglocks secured her craft to the deck of the Pisus, Phoenix finally allowed herself to relax. Already her mind was going through the list of things that needed to be done now that she was done with her assigned CAP. There was the post-flight check to perform, debriefing, the weekly computer systems check to initiate for their small fleet of four vessels, and then with any luck she would be able to read her daughter a bed time story tonight instead of just kissing her already sleeping daughter goodnight when she finally found her way to quarters.

As soon as her Viper had come to a stop on the flight deck, Phoenix was removing her gloves and helmet. As the cockpit canopy slid back, she handed the helmet to the flight mechanic waiting at the top of the ladder.

"How was the flight, Phoenix?" Recruit Jason Bronson asked, as he took the helmet from Phoenix. He placed the helmet on the top of the ladder and then reached down to unfasten the locking collar for the pilot.

"Thankfully, boring," Phoenix replied as she lifted herself from the cockpit, thankful to be able to leave it behind.

There was a time when she had happily thought of a cockpit as her second home but that seemed like a another time now, in more ways than one. When she had chosen to turn in her wings almost four years ago, it was with the intention of never sitting in a cockpit again. She had enjoyed flying but the pressures of combat and military life, which she had already resented from her childhood, had taken the joy out of that. The complexities and problems to solve offered to her by the world of computer programming had beckoned to her. She had finally decided to follow her heart despite knowing how disappointed her father would be. She had never once regretted that choice.

Nor did she regret her choice to get back behind the controls of a viper again. The Cylon attack had changed the world they lived in and her skills as a pilot were just as vital to their survival as her computer skills. Despite being able to refuse the rank offered to her, she couldn't refuse the request to take to the skies again to protect the ships they now called their homes and her daughter.

"Any problems with the ship?" Bronson asked, as he stood to the side to allow Phoenix to descend the ladder.

"She seems to be flying a little off balance. I think the port engine might be a bit sluggish. Other than that, things seemed okay," Phoenix replied, as her feet hit the metal flight deck. Raised voices made her look to her right where he wingman for the day, Raymond "Hothead" Gibson seemed to be chewing a flight mechanic. She was relieved to note it was one of the more experienced flight crew from the Pisus that had stayed on board to help with the experiments, rather than one of the young mechanics originally assigned to the Ares, like Bronson had been.

"I'm glad I haven't had to deal with him," Bronson commented from the top of the ladder, having followed Pheonix's gaze.

Phoenix gazed up at the young mechanic, who had been two weeks shy of finishing basic training when the Cylons had attacked the colonies. Bronson and his fellow trainees from the Ares had been thrown right into the fire, and with very few exceptions, had performed their duties without fail. Even those who had balked at certain times had to be cut some slack. Their simple training mission of 'protection' detail had changed to a flee for survival in a matter of minutes. One could hardly blame those who had gotten 'cold feet' in the midst of all that.

"Yeah, the chief isn't going to throw you to the wolf just yet, Bronson," Phoenix replied. Hothead Gibson was one of the pilots onboard the Pisus that she had flown with back during her time as a Colonial Fleet aviator. She knew how the guy operated and could deal with him, hence the reason their CAG, Colonel Raymond 'Lonewolf' Belmont, usually paired the two of them up. His bouts of anger were just his way of blowing off steam. "But when the day comes, remember Hothead is all bark and no bite. He likes to spout out words and shoot things out of the sky but he's one of the few pilots in the Colonial Fleet who hasn't been in an off duty fist fight."

"Were you ever involved in an off duty fist fight, ma'am?"

Phoenix smiled up at the mechanic. "First of all, drop the ma'am. I'm still a civie and second, I've thrown a few punches but that's as far as things got."

"Rumor has it you punched a superior officer once?"

"Well, that is one rumor that is true," Phoenix replied, not about to deny the charge. She had long ago come to terms with the actions of her past and moved beyond them. She may not be proud of some of the things she had done, but they were a part of her. "If you ever want to resign from the fleet, Bronson, that is not the way I recommend carrying out the resignation. Only thing standing between me and a dishonorable discharge was Daddy pulling a few strings."

"Do you ever regret leaving the fleet?"

Phoenix paused a moment considering her answer. "I regret the way I chose to go about it, but I don't regret leaving the fleet. Now, if you'll excuse me I'd like to get out of this flight uniform and take care of business."

"You got it, ma'a . . . Phoenix," Bronson replied, catching his own error before the pilot had a chance to correct him. "I'll have her purring like a kitten by the next time you have to take her up."

"Good to hear. Carry on, recruit." Phoenix said, glancing once more toward her wingman. The other pilot was still fuming about something. Not really in the frame of mind of dealing with Hothead right then, she instead started across the flight deck. She planned on checking in with Lonewolf to give him the CAP report, then showering and changing before heading to CIC. Despite the long hours she had already put in, she knew she had a few more to log before she could call it day.

That was the same boat they were all in. Despite the low number of casualties they had suffered since fleeing the colonies, Pisus was still understaffed. The ship had been operating with a half compliment while she and her crew had been utilizing the ship for their experiments. It was why the ship's former XO was now commanding the ship and why their CAG had come out of retirement to oversee the two viper squadrons of Pisus and Ares.

The harsh reality was that life was no longer about following your dream and doing what you wanted. Their very survival hinged on everybody putting their skills to use as well as learning new ones. It was about doing what needed to be done even if there were personal sacrifices that needed to be made, like her climbing behind the controls of a viper again or Lonewolf coming out of retirement.

Still, there were times when Phoenix wondered if it was worth it. They had been running for six months now, with no end in sight. With each day that passed, the likelihood of joining up with other survivors got slimmer. Each jump that helped them evade the Cylons only diminished those chances further. Space was a vast place, and this small group of four ships were on their own. The hope they had began with on day one was slowly dwindling. Phoenix had no idea what made her fellow shipmates go on day after day, but she knew that if it wasn't for her daughter she would have long ago given up. Her daughter was the only thing she had to live for anymore, and finding that something to live for was the only motivation there was these days.

* * *

"Viper 7647, break off on your approach. You're too low," Galactica's flight controller said through the radio.

It's recipient didn't receive the message, as he was lost in his own thoughts. Lost in the memory of being alone, adrift in space with his air running out. He recalled feeling a touch of excitement as he could finally see an end to the long hours, constant running, and orders that he didn't agree with. An end to the guilt he had felt since destroying the Olympic Carrier. No, that wasn't right. Yes, he felt guilty about pulling the trigger even though the ship had been apparently abandoned but the guilty feeling hadn't began there. He had felt guilty ever since they had escaped the Cylons at Ragnar. Guilty because he had survived when so many others hadn't.

He had no naive notions that he was alone in that guilt. He was sure many in the fleet shared that feeling of survivors guilt. For him though, it had only added to the feelings he had been struggling with before the Cylon attack on the colonies. The anger he had felt against his father that he now knew to be at least partially unjustified and guilt over the secrets he had been keeping from people who should have been important in his life.

"Apollo, break off your approach!"

The now near frantic order from flight control finally broke through the distracted pilot's thoughts. Quickly taking in the situation, Apollo banked his fighter hard to the left, veering away from Galactica's landing bay.

"Viper 7647, everything okay out there?"

"This is Viper 7647, Galactica," Apollo replied in a calm voice, despite his heart still pounding from the near crash landing. "Everything is fine. Coming around for another approach," he continued, purposely not giving an explanation to the missed landing attempt. He wasn't about to explain himself. Mistakes were made, and he wasn't one to think he was above them. He was just thankful the mistake had been made on a routine landing and not a combat landing.

Taking a deep breath, Apollo let it out slowly in an attempt to ground himself and focus his thoughts on the task at hand. He wasn't suicidal. He had no desire to splatter his fighter on Galactica's landing bay despite his admission to Kara two weeks ago that part of him hadn't wanted to come back from his space walk. Like everyone else, he was tired and wanted to find the break in the endless cycle of fleeing from the Cylons. Though he had welcomed that escape when it seemed inevitable he wasn't going to actively try to bring about those circumstances again. If that was the case, he would have used his side arm long before now.

Turning the Viper around, Apollo made another approaching to Galactica. Maintaining focus on the task at hand it wasn't long before his Viper was safely in the hangar bay. He paid little attention to the routine activity going on around him as he pulled off his gloves and helmet. It wasn't until he went to hand his helmet off to the flight mechanic that he realized it wasn't a flight mechanic that had climbed the ladder.

"Everything okay, Lee?" Admiral William Adama asked quietly, hoping the use of his son's name would make Lee more receptive to the question, as he took Apollo's helmet from him.

"Yeah. I missed a landing approach, that's all, Admiral" Lee replied, reaching up to removed the locking collar for the helmet. He was deliberately ignoring his father's use of his name and keeping to the formal address in an attempt to hide his surprise. He had been expecting to get some ribbing from his three pilot's who had been flying the CAP but had hoped it would be limited to that. "Nobody can be perfect one hundred percent of the time, sir," he added.

"It's not like you to totally miss an approach like that, though," Admiral Adama countered, not about to let Lee brush the incident off. He had come down to the landing bay to talk with Lee after several of his pilots, including Starbuck, had expressed concern about Lee pushing himself too hard and not acting like himself. They had said he had been more withdrawn and more irritable when it came to mistakes instead of supportive and helpful. Though Bill had noticed the withdrawn part himself, he had been willing to let it go. Lee had been through a lot with recent events and a close call like the one he'd had only weeks ago would be enough to shake anyone. The concerns from the pilots and now this botched landing attempt gave him cause for concern though.

"So, I messed up! Is that a crime?" Lee asked, climbing from the cockpit and moving past his father. "I've always been a disappointment to you though so that really shouldn't surprise you," he continued, making his way down the ladder.

The uncharacteristic outburst had William even more concerned. Following his son down the ladder, he placed a hand on Lee's shoulder when he was standing beside him. "Lee, I want to talk to you for a few minutes."

"I don't really have the time. I've got paperwork to do, and word has it one of my pilots may be out with a sprained ankle which is totally going to throw off the rotation," Lee replied, his voice mildly calmer now.

"Hey, did you space out there, Apollo," a laughing voice interrupted. Seconds later Crow and Helo who had been flying CAP with Apollo came into sight. "That landing approach would have made a nugget look . . ." Crow's taunt trailed off upon seeing Admiral Adama standing by Apollo.

Quickly, Crow, Helo, and Racetrack, who had been following behind the other two, stood at attention, raising there hand in a salute.

"As you were," Admiral Adama told the pilots, even as he hastily returned the salute as military protocol required.

"Sorry, sir. We didn't realize you were on the flight deck," Crow said apologetically as he held his hands behind him in an at ease position.

"None of us did, Crow. It's not often the Admiral shows up to welcome back a CAP," Apollo interjected, the sarcasm clear in his voice.

Admiral Adama looked over at his son, though he tried to mask his surprise. His son usually held his sarcastic comments in check unless they were somewhere private. The other three pilots looked nervously in directions other then the CAG and the ship's commander.

"Why don't the three of you shower and hit the rack. Morning briefing is at 0800 tomorrow morning," Apollo told his pilot, ignoring the look he was getting from his father. "There's probably going to be changes to the schedule."

"Yes, sir," the other three pilots replied, all three of them trying to disguise the relief they felt. They could sense the tension between father and son and were more than happy to vacate the area.

Alone, other than the flight mechanics doing post-flight checks on the vipers, Lee turned to face his father. "What was it you needed me for, sir?" he asked, ignoring the not so subtle looks the mechanics were throwing in his direction when they thought they wouldn't be seen. "Or did you just come down to observe routine landings?"

"I came down here to talk to you, Lee," William replied, trying to stay calm. Letting Lee see that he was getting to him would only make the situation worse. "Several of your pilots have expressed concern about you and from what I'm seeing I think those concerns are justified. Perhaps you need to take a step back and delegate some things to others. Let Kara rework the flight rotation for example."

Lee let out a bitter laugh. "No one would be able to read what she comes up with, not to mention her method of reworking the schedule would probably be to simply plug in a name with no concern of when their next scheduled rotation is and I'd have a pilot flying back to back CAPs." He didn't bother to add the fact that she had the overnight CAP.

"Let Helo do it then. He's got the most seniority after Starbuck. It would be good experience for him," Admiral Adama replied, clearly not about to let the suggestion slide so easily. His intention when coming down here was to get Lee to take a step back from the amount of time he was putting into the job voluntarily. From the reports from the other pilots, he believed that Lee was rapidly heading toward being burned out. From his brief exchange already, William was more convinced of that.

"I can handle it. It shouldn't take me more than a half hour tops," Lee countered.

"And then you'll spend how much time doing other paperwork before grabbing a couple hours of sleep before you start your day again. My guess is that your on the rotation to fly CAP at least part of the day again tomorrow."

"So what if I am," Lee replied defiantly. "The pilot rotation is at my discretion."

"True, but I've pulled your flight logs, Lee. You've been putting a lot of hours in the cockpit since returning to Galactica. Since the fleet had to jump last night at twenty-one hundred hours, you've logged eighteen hours and it hasn't even been twenty-four hours since that jump. You were talking about Starbuck scheduling a pilot for back-to-back CAPs and yet two days ago you did exactly that."

"Flattop wasn't feeling well. Ask the flight mechanics who had to clean puke up off the floor and out of the cockpit of his viper. Someone had to take his place."

"And you feel a responsibility to not ask your pilots to do something you wouldn't do yourself. I get it, Lee, but your responsibilities extend beyond flying routine patrols and defending this ship during the attack."

"With all do respect, sir, I know my duties and responsibilities as CAG and I'm not letting any of them slide."

"True, you haven't but you're putting in too many hours, Lee. Eventually something is going to give, and signs of that happening are already showing. Your pilots are starting to notice it and I just watched you botch a routine landing."

"I got distracted on the approach. If you would employ the automated landing system that every ship in the fleet that doesn't have an archaic commander at the helm put to use, then it wouldn't have been an issue at all."

William felt his anger rising again at his son's comment. He knew a lot of people weren't happy with that particular standing order on Galactica but he believed it helped keep the pilots on their toes and less likely to make mistakes when it did count. "And if you got distracted during combat landing instead of a routine landing, what would have happened then?" he asked, taking a step closer to his son. He didn't wait for an answer before continuing. "I have no desire to have any of my pilots in med bay, or worse yet, in the morgue, because of something that could have been avoided. Yes, mistakes happened but they shouldn't happen because a pilot is pushing themselves too far in an attempt to escape dealing with something else by burying themselves in work."

"And you think that's what I'm doing?" Lee asked, looking straight into his father's eyes.

"Yes. I think ejecting from the Blackbird has left you more shaken than you want to admit, even to yourself, and you're looking for ways to avoid dealing with that," William said, holding his son's gaze. "I think that you're pushing yourself for as long as you can so that when you finally do climb in your rack your so tired you fall right to sleep instead of having time to think about things before sleep claims you."

Lee finally looked away at his father's last presumption, knowing it was true. However, it wasn't just the near death experience of a few week's ago that he was trying to avoid. He didn't want to relive his father getting shot by one of _his _pilots. Or see the Olympic Carrier go up in flames because he had pulled the trigger. Mostly though, he didn't want to continue to see the faces of those he had loved that in all likelihood had been killed in the Cylon attack on the colonies. Given what tomorrow was though, they were closer to the surface of his thoughts now than when the attack had first happened, and Lee hadn't thought that was possible.

William let the tone of his voice soften as he continued, sensing that he was finally starting to get through to his son. "I didn't come down here to issue ultimatums, son but I'm giving you one now. Either you start delegating some of your work to others and stop putting in so many flight hours, on your own free will or I will temporarily relieve you of duty and let Starbuck run things for awhile."

"We're already short on pilots! You can't do that!"

"I can, and I will if it becomes necessary. So what's your decision."

Lee sighed. Despite his protest, he had no doubt his father would carry through with the threat he had just issued. "I'll get Helo to rework the flight schedule and call it a night. The paperwork can wait until tomorrow."

"Good," William said, relieved that Lee hadn't tried calling him on his threat but knowing that his son wasn't going to be happy with the next stipulation either. "Along with replacing the injured pilot, tell Helo to replace you in the CAP rotation for the next two days."

"You're grounding me, now?" Lee asked incredulously, looking back at his father. His raised voice had the flight mechanics giving up all pretense of discretion as they all looked toward the duo.

Aware of their audience, William didn't try to keep his voice low when he said the next words. Trying to hide what he was going to say would only fuel rumors as people tried to guess what his reply was. As Lee had already attracted attention by his outburst it was best to let those watching know where he was going with this.

"From routine patrol, yes I am, Captain. You've been putting in too many flight hours. If there is a call to Condition One, then you are free to fly but unless that happens I want you on board Galactic. Am I understood?"

"Yes, sir," Lee replied. "Will that be all, Admiral?"

William Adama held back the sigh that he felt ready to escape. This was not the conversation he had intended to come down here and have. His intention on meeting Lee when he came back from the CAP tonight had been so that Lee couldn't avoid him. He had no idea how his son made that avoidance look so easy when they both were aboard the same ship. All he had wanted to do was talk to Lee, as father and son, and once again the conversation had spiraled completely out of control.

"Yes, Captain," William replied instead. Returning the salute is son gave him. As Lee turned to walk away however, Galactica's commander reached out and grabbed Lee's arm, causing his son to pause and look back at him. "Look, Lee," he began, lowering his voice once again. "I didn't come down here as your commanding officer. I came down here as a concerned father who wanted to have a conversation with his son and I still do. So why don't you take some time and finish up what you need to do, shower, change and then meet me in my quarters. I know you haven't eaten yet, and what with fleet politics and all the little things that have popped up today neither have I."

"Is that another order disguised as a request, sir?" Lee asked, his eyes still dark with the simmering anger he felt.

"No, it's a simple invitation," William said, feeling a wave a disappointment wash over him even as he released the hold he had on his son's arm. "I won't come looking for you tonight if you don't show, but I hope you take me up on it. I'm concerned about you, Lee, and not just as your commanding officer."

William decided to let the conversation end right there and started walking away before Lee could give him an answer, sarcastic or otherwise. With a heavy heart he headed toward his quarters to wait and see if his son would take him up on the dinner invitation.


	2. Dwindling Hopes

_AN: Thanks to the few of you who took the time to alert and/or review chapter 1 of this story. I'm glad to see it caught a few people's interest. This chapter focuses completely on my original characters and was originally a second section to chapter 1 but I wanted to get the canon characters into chapter 1 a bit so I reorganized. Hope you enjoy._

* * *

Three hours after ending her CAP duty, Phoenix was walking through the quiet corridors of the Pisus after initiating the weekly computer security check. Though she usually remained in CIC during the check so that she could be on hand to handle any problems that might arise on Pisus or one of the other three ships in their small fleet but the last few days had been busy ones. Other than breakfast time, she hadn't seen much of her daughter and she really wanted to be the one to tuck Laura Jean in tonight. Besides, most things her military counterparts could handle and if something arose that they couldn't, then she was only a page away. The security check took three hours to run, and she planned on being back before then.

Reaching the guest quarters she still occupied despite technically now being a part of the crew, Phoenix turned the wheel on the hatch and stepped inside. One lone lamp dimly lit the living area of the quarters. The small room where her daughter slept was the only other place light was coming from. As she walked in that direction, she heard voices.

"I miss mommy reading me a bedtime story."

"Your mother's been busy," came Jaina Reese's response. Jaina was nineteen years old and had been hired to help take care of Laura during what was supposed to be at most a two-week stay onboard the Pisus. Needless to say, the position had become more permanent than originally intended. "I'm sure she misses reading you your bedtime story too, and as soon as she can be here, she will be."

"Looks like I'm just in time then," Phoenix interjected, stepping into her daughter's bedroom.

Laura hopped off the bed she had been sitting on and ran toward her mother, a picture clutched in her left hand. Kneeling down, Phoenix met her daughter with open arms, holding the little girl close to her as Laura hugged her.

"You made it!" Laura exclaimed, her voice muffled from her proximity to her mother. "Are you done for tonight?" the little girl asked, not releasing her hold on the older woman.

"Not quite, sweetheart. I just took a break so I can read you a story and tuck you in for the night. So why don't you pick a book and climb in bed."

Laura finally let go of her mother and ran over to the stack of books in the corner. Getting to her feet, Phoenix looked over at Jaina. "How's she been today?"

"Well, that's the first smile I've seen on her face today, Rebecca," Jaina said quietly taking a step closer to her employer and now friend. The two had become each other's confidants over the past six months they had been aboard Pisus. "She's upset her dad won't be around for her birthday and scared that you'll be gone all day too."

"If nothing out of the ordinary pops up, I'll be with her most of the day tomorrow," Rebecca replied. It was her daughter's second birthday and she hoped to spend the day with her daughter. If the Cylons left them alone for another day and no emergencies popped up, she was going to do exactly that. "I've made arrangements to spend some time on Cloud Six," she added, referring to the luxury cruise liner that Pisus had made their escape from the colonies with. Along with Ares and the mining ship Astral Ore, Cloud Six made up the small fleet Pisus was leading through space, in search of a haven, that might not even exist. Though the Cylon attacks seemed to be getting further apart, their enemy didn't seem to be content to just let them go about their own way. Just when they would start to think that perhaps they had finally shook their pursuers, a few more Raiders would appear on DRADIS. "You can either join us or take some time for yourself."

"I think Laura Jean needs the time alone with her mother tomorrow," Jaina replied, with a smile. "In fact, I'm going to slip out to the living quarters now and let you put her to bed for a change."

As Jaina went to walk past Rebecca, the older woman reached out for Jaina's hand. "Thank-you, for all that you do. It makes it easier knowing she's with you when I'm away."

"You're welcome," the teenager replied, with a smile, squeezing Rebecca's hand before slipping out of the room.

"I'm ready, mama," Laura Jean called, having climbed up in bed again.

"Coming, sweetheart," Rebecca replied, smiling herself as she head toward her daughter. Sitting down on the bed next to her daughter, she reached for the selected book. Not surprisingly, Rebecca found that her daughter had selected the collection of fairy tales. Before the Cylons had attacked the colonies, Laura had only let her dad read to her from the book. It had been their special thing for when her daddy was at home. Now, the book was sacred between herself and her daughter. "I'll read you two tonight," she told her daughter.

Laura pouted but didn't argue. "Can they be new ones?"

"Of course," Rebecca replied, turning to the part of the book that contained the fairy tales that had yet to be read.

Relaxing against the headboard, Rebecca started reading the first fairy tale. Though she couldn't make out the words, Laura Jean still looked over her mom's arm at the book while her mother read. Rebecca knew that before too long she would be teaching the inquisitive little girl how to read.

In what seemed like no time to both of them, they came to the end of the second fairy tale. Closing the book, Rebecca looked down at her daughter. "Now it's time for you to climb under the covers and get some sleep. Tomorrow is your birthday, and I have a surprise for you."

Instead of her face lighting up at the mention of a surprise, Laura Jean's mouth turned down into a frown.

"What's wrong, Laura?" Rebecca asked, sitting the book on the night stand that held the small lamp, as she looked down at her daughter in concern.

"I want Daddy to be here for my birthday. He promised he would be," the little girl said as tears filled up her blue eyes.

"Oh sweetie," Rebecca said, wrapping her arms around her daughter and pulling her close to her. "I know that was a promise that your Daddy very much wanted to keep and if he could, he would be with us tomorrow," she told her daughter, trying to keep her own voice steady as she talked about the man she had loved. She had exchanged a quick message with him shortly before the Cylon attack had taken place. Never did she imagine that those would be the last words she would speak with him. She hadn't even told him the customary 'I love you' before she had signed off as her mind had already been going over the plan for the next test run they had been going to conduct. It was something she regretted, much as she regretted the long hours away from her daughter now. Nowadays though, it was a matter of their survival and not just getting too wrapped up in work.

"Do you think there is a chance daddy is out there?" Laura asked in a tearful voice.

Rebecca hesitated before answering. As much as she didn't want to give her daughter false hope she didn't want to break her daughter's spirit completely. The little girl was already solemn much of the time. She didn't want those moments of joy for the little girl to disappear completely.

"Well, there are other survivors out there," Rebecca replied slowly, thinking of the report Juniper had brought back to Pisus after the scouting mission to the rendevous point at Ragnar. Juniper had said they had spotted several ships jump away while Galactica held off a Cylon attack and then jumped away themselves. Knowing that they had missed joining up with other survivors had been a bitter disappointment for their small group. For Rebecca, Galactica's jump had taken away her last hope of joining up with family, other than her daughter, vanish. Though their hope at the beginning had been to cross paths with the other group of survivors, they knew it had been a long shot. Six months in and they had all but given up hope of that happening. "But the chances of your father being among them or us crossing paths with them are slim."

"But there is a chance. All we need is hope."

~_The sweet innocence of the hope of a child_, ~ Rebecca thought, as she continued to hug her daughter. She caught sight of the picture Laura Jean carried around with her quite a bit these days. It was a picture from her wedding day, and both the people in it were smiling back. She had already been pregnant with Laura at the time, and things had seemed to be falling into place. What she wouldn't give to feel like that again.

"Do you think you can hold onto that hope for the both of us, Sweetheart?" Rebecca asked.

"I'll try mommy," Laura replied even as the ship's public address system came to life with a page for Rebecca to report to CIC. "Can I come with you, mommy?" Laura asked, holding tighter instead of letting go.

Rebecca hesitated. It wouldn't be the first time Laura had been in the ship's control center while she worked and as it hadn't been a stat page, Rebecca figured it was nothing too serious. Probably just something with the security check on one of the ships. She tried to recall who was on the rotation for the night watch and remembered it was the one night of the week that Colonel Cruise took the night watch. Though now Pisus' commander, the Colonel insisted that he couldn't very well ask those serving under him to perform duties beyond what was expected of them, if he didn't do so himself. Knowing the Colonel had developed a soft spot for Laura Jean even before they had fled from the Cylons, Rebecca didn't see the harm in her daughter being up late one night.

"As it is almost your birthday, I guess I can let you stay up a little later," Rebecca said, letting go of her daughter. She stood up and walked over to the room's bureau. Opening the top drawer, she removed her daughter's bathrobe. Turning she found that Laura Jean had already climbed down from the bed and was heading toward her mother.

"Do you need me to finish up?" Jaina asked, coming into the doorway.

"No thanks. I'm going to take Jaina with me this time. Why don't you head back to your own quarters for the night," Rebecca replied, as she helped Laura Jean put the robe on.

"You sure?"

"Yes. I think Laura still needs some mother and daughter time and things should be fairly quiet up in CIC tonight."

"Okay. You know where I'm at if something changes," Jaina replied, turning and heading from the room as Rebecca knelt down and tied the sash on the bathrobe.

"You ready?" Rebecca asked, still kneeling in front of Laura Jean. The little girl nodded, her left hand still holding on to her cherished photo. Rebecca stood, and took her daughter's hand. "Let's go then."

With Laura Jean in tow the walk to CIC took a little longer than usual. As Rebecca had expected, the room was quiet. There was only the bare minimum staff on duty. PO Ana Easton was sitting at the station Rebecca normally used for her work when in CIC. Though the woman's brow was furrowed in concentration there didn't seem to be any urgency about her.

At the sound of footsteps entering CIC, Colonel Randall Cruise turned in their direction. "I see you brought along a hitchhiker," the commander of Pisus commented, seeing Laura Jean by Rebecca's side.

"She asked to come. I hope you don't mind."

"Of course not. We could do with a bit of sunshine around here," Colonel Cruise replied.

"What's going on?" Rebecca asked, well aware that whatever the issue was that had resulted in her being paged to CIC, the Colonel would have at least a basic knowledge of it.

"The security check uncovered a failed firewall in our communications systems," Colonel Cruise replied, his voice taking on more authority as he began discussing business. He began heading to where Easton was sitting and Rebecca, still holding on to Laura's hand, followed. "Granted, it's only one of three in place but Ares is reporting the same result with their communication system so I figured it was something you should take a look at ASAP."

The added firewalls had been added to the computers following the Cylon attack as a further precaution after almost all of the networks in the ship had been taken offline. There had been a few critical networks that had needed to stay in place to maintain ship operations. The lack of networks meant more work for the Pisus, but added safety against the Cylons taking control of the vessel. Rebecca had also purged the computer of the new defense program that had been developed by Gaius Baltar and introduced the program she had been testing for protection on the Remote Emergency Control Takeover System they had been testing in the Mark V Vipers they had on board Pisus. The idea behind the RECT System was the ability for the home ship to take control of the viper in case the pilot was unable to fly the craft for some reason. Given the danger of someone abusing the system that was supposed to be used in an emergency only, Rebecca and her team had designed a series of firewall protection and security protocols for the system that were separate from all other ships functions. Following their flight from the Cylons, that protection had been implemented to protect the few networks left on the ships of their small fleet as well as the networked computers of the Mark VII Vipers. So far, the Cylons had not been able to penetrate their computer systems.

"Could be nothing more than a glitch in the programming. The security protocol wasn't designed to be used as it is, and it was a rush to get it in place. Coming across glitches is to be expected as I explained earlier. I'll get it sorted though."

"I have no doubt that you will," Colonel Cruise replied. "Given the reports gathered on how easily the Cylons shut down our ships in the attack on the colonies, your computer skills are probably one of the things that have gotten us this far."

The three of them had reached the station Easton was working at. The computer specialist looked up at their approach and upon seeing Rebecca immediately began explaining the situation in technical details Colonel Cruise couldn't follow. Cruise looked down at the little girl that had tagged along with her mother.

"Want to be my assistant for a while?" Colonel Cruise asked her.

The little girl looked up at her mother, her eyes silently asking permission. Although Laura Jean wasn't smiling, Rebecca saw a glimmer of excitement in her beseeching eyes.

"Go ahead," Rebecca told her daughter. "Just don't get in the way or cause any trouble."

Laura Jean let out a squeal of delight even as Colonel Cruise reached down and picked the little girl up. "She won't be any trouble at all, will you Laura Jean?" Colonel Cruise asked, looking at the little girl. Laura shook her head no in response to the answer. Looking from the daughter toward her mother, the Colonel put on a mischievous grin. "It isn't like either of your parents knew how to cause trouble," he added.

"That was a different time. I've matured since then," Rebecca replied, memories of the spoiled, military brat she use to be coming to the surface. Her dad's name had pulled a lot of weight in the fleet and her younger self had used that to her advantage until a fellow pilot had pointed out that she was doing what was expected of her instead of what she wanted and her that her behavior was just a facade to hide her fear of failing and letting people down.

"_If you create this bad girl reputation within the fleet, then no one is going to be expecting much of you. It's the perfect cover."_

Those words had gotten her thinking about her life and what she really wanted to do with. They had reawakened the fifteen-year-old girl who had loved problem solving and algorithms over flying a plane and shooting things out of the sky. Rebecca had never wanted the military life, but when her brother had drowned after his high school graduation that year, life had changed for her whole family. She had heard the sadness in her father's voice as he spoke of his son's dreams to join the Colonial Fleet that would never be realized. It was then that she felt compelled to carry that family legacy on, despite her own dreams but she had never been happy doing it. She had ended up resenting her father and the path she had chosen and had vented that resentment through her behavior.

Well, she hadn't failed. She had stopped following the path her father had set for her and started being who she wanted to be. She had started taking responsibility for her choices and actions, instead of relying on a name to keep her out of trouble. As for letting people down, Rebecca often wondered if her father was disappointed in the choice she had made for her life. Now she might never know.

"I guess I'll give you that one," Colonel Cruise conceded, having seen nothing except professionalism since she had stepped on board the Pisus. Given her reputation from her time in the service, Pisus' former XO had his doubts when he heard who was going to be conducting the experiments. He looked from Rebecca to the little girl he was holding. "However, let's hope you take after your daddy. He's a bit more of a straight arrow than your mommy."

"What is a straight arrow?" Laura Jean asked, tilting her head to one side as she looked at the Colonel inquisitively.

Neither Easton nor Rebecca could make out the colonel's response as he started walking away with Laura in his hands.

"I hope I don't regret letting her go with him," Rebecca said softly, as the two women returned their attention to the problem they were facing.

PO Easton just smiled as she resumed her explanation of the problem at hand. Like many of the others on board the Pisus, she was just grateful to have Laura Jean around to ease the tension of their reality. The little girl was definitely a ray of sunshine in an otherwise dreary world.


	3. Reaching The Limit

**AN: So here is chapter 3. Enjoy the quick updates while you can because my muse seriously has ADD and I've been known to have some distance between updates, but I figured why the muse is on a roll, I'd update again. Thanks to those guests, and those who signed in, who reviewed. Appreciate the feedback and support Nice to know at least a few people are reading!**

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Lee was relieved to find the showers empty when he stepped inside the room twenty minutes after finally leaving the flight deck. As he had promised his father, he hadn't touched any of the paperwork that had been waiting for him. His stop in the pilot's briefing room had been limited to grabbing the file containing the roster and flight rotation papers. Next, he had stopped by medbay to get a status update on Hatchet, who had apparently slipped in the shower earlier that evening and injured his ankle. He was relieved to find the injury limited to a minor sprain, even if that did mean Hatchet was grounded for the next five days while the ankle healed.

Leaving medbay, he had headed for his quarters. Dropping the file onto his bunk, he had exchanged a few words with Flattop, while he had grabbed a change of clothes and his toiletries. His original plan had been to shower and then returning to his quarters to rework the flight schedule despite promising his father to turn that task over to Helo. He didn't need to push his own work off on the other pilots. All of them were overworked. Being CAG didn't give him any special rights. If anything, he should be leading by example, like he had been doing.

Reaching into his flight suit, he took out the small photograph he kept on him at all times. The last thing he wanted to do was leave it in the pocket when the uniform was laundered. He had done it once, and the photo had been promptly replaced from home. There was no way to replace it now. This photo was the last connection he had to the little girl smiling back at him. The little girl who would have turned two tomorrow.

Blinking away the tears, Lee tucked the picture safely between articles of clothing that were sitting on the bench. Not only didn't he have time to get sentimental, now definitely wasn't the time. He might have the shower facilities to himself for now but that could change at anytime.

Minutes later, Lee was stepping under the stream of hot water. As the water ran over his stiff and tired muscles, Lee realized just how weary he was, both physically and emotionally. Leaning forward, he let his head rest on the wall of the shower stall, the stream of water hitting the back of his neck and cascading down.

Along with the physical relaxation that the warm water brought, the anger that had been fueling his actions from the moment Lee had seen his father, on top of that ladder, was being eased away. At first it had been anger at himself for botching a basic landing. His wounded pride upon learning his father had been there to witness it had only fueled the anger. From then on, he had naturally gone on the defensive, his sarcasm and anger refusing to let him see the concern his father had been showing. Concern for not only one of his officers, but for his son.

Raising his head, Lee held his breath as he submerged himself completely into the running water hoping to drown out the sounds of the conversation on the flight deck that was now playing through his mind. Tongues were sure to be wagging by morning and he only had himself to blame. Though why did his father have to choose the flight deck to ambush him, he didn't know.

By the time Lee stepped from the shower, he felt more at peace even though the physical weariness from the long hours he had been putting in was more apparent. He had also decided that he wasn't going to try fighting his father on his latest ultimatums. As soon as he returned his stuff to his quarters, he would find Helo and turn the flight schedule over to him. As his father had pointed out, Helo was next in seniority of Kara, who was out on CAP tonight anyway. After that, to keep his father from hunting him down tomorrow, he would take the old man up on the dinner invitation. Lee figured he had to eat anyway, and perhaps eating with his father would help his dad put some of his concerns at ease. That of course was assuming that the dinner didn't deteriorate into a shouting match.

Lee was pulling his green tank top on over his grey shirt, the photograph now in his pants pocket, when the door opened. Glancing in that direction, he saw Helo and Crow, still dressed in their flight uniforms, entering. The other two pilots had clearly had other priorities than his own.

"See, Helo, our CAG did survive the admiral's wrath," Crow kidded, looking at Lee despite the pretense that he was talking to Helo.

Not in the mood to even acknowledge his pilot's ribbing right then, Lee chose to ignore the comment, instead looking at Helo. "Can I talk to you out in the corridor for a few minutes, Helo?" Lee requested, gathering the rest of his belongings. He figured now was as good a time as any to give Helo the added task of reworking the flight schedule and he wanted to do it without Crow's attempts of stand-up comedy.

"Of course, Captain," Helo said, picking up on his superior officer's serious tone.

As Lee gathered his belongings, Helo shot Crow a look even as he found an empty place to deposit his change of uniform and toiletries. Crow just shrugged his shoulders as he mouthed good luck to Helo. Taking a drink from the bottle of water he still held, Helo followed Lee out of the bathroom.

Stepping out into the cooler air of the corridor, Lee felt a wave of dizziness suddenly pass over him. Clutching his belongings to him with one hand, Galactica's CAG pressed his other hand against the wall, trying to steady himself even as he felt a hand grab his other arm.

"Are you okay, sir?" Helo asked, now standing beside Lee.

As the dizzy feeling passed, Lee glanced over at his fellow pilot. The concerned look on Helo's face matched the tone of his voice. "Yeah, I'm fine," Lee managed, straightening up despite still feeling a bit disorientated. "Guess the shower I took was hotter than I thought," Lee said casually, hoping if he made light of the incident his fellow pilot would too.

"That and you probably haven't eaten most of the day," Helo said, not letting go of Lee's arm quite yet. He still thought his CAG looked kind of pale. "Food was the first thing on my mind when I got back," he added. The statement told Lee what Helo and Crow had been up to since they had left the flight deck.

"I plan on doing something about that shortly. I've got an invitation to dinner with the Admiral," Lee replied, pulling his arm from Helo's grip as he fought against another wave of dizziness that was threatening. In an attempt to hide how he was feeling, Lee tried to casually lean against the wall.

Sensing his superior officer's reluctance to admit to anything that seemed like weakness, but noticing that the color still hadn't returned to Lee's face, Helo silently held out his bottle of water to Lee. After a couple of years living in the close quarters of a battlestar, certain reservations typical in society, like drinking after someone else, tended to get blurred.

"What did you want to talk to me about, Captain?" Helo asked, as Lee silently accepted the bottle of water and took a swig.

Lee put twisted the top back onto the bottle and handed it back to Helo. "I don't know if you've heard but Hatchet sprained his ankle and is going to be out of the flight rotation for the next five days. I need you to rework the schedule for the time frame for me."

"Isn't that something that should fall to Starbuck?" Helo asked. Starbuck was the last pilot he wanted even give the impression that he was encroaching on their territory.

"Probably, except that not only is she out on CAP tonight but I'd never be able to decipher the schedule in the morning which is the last headache I need."

Helo bit his lower lip to keep from laughing, although he knew where Lee was coming from with the assessment. Starbuck's illegible writing was well known on Galactica.

"No problem, sir," Helo replied, once he felt he could trust his voice again. "Anything else other than Hatchet's injury I need to know?"

"Yeah. You'll need to replace me in the CAP for the next two days per the Admiral's orders," Lee told him.

"The Admiral grounded you?" Helo asked, surprised by that turn of events although as soon as the words were out he wished he had rephrased the question a little differently. Though the term grounded was normal terminology when a pilot had been pulled from flight duty, given Lee's relationship with the admiral, the phrase grounded could take on a whole different meaning.

"From routine flight, yes," Lee admitted, looking at Helo as a conversation from a few days back came back to him. Helo had offered to split Flattop's patrol duty with him the day he had flown back to back CAPs. When he had refused the offer, Helo had expressed concern that he was trying to take on too much. "Seems a few of my pilots have expressed their concern that I haven't been acting like myself lately and have been putting in too many flight hours. You wouldn't know anything about that, would you Helo?"

Helo didn't even glance away at the slightly veiled accusation. "I don't know who else went to him, but yes I did express my concern, Captain," Helo replied. "I did try to talk to you first, if you remember?"

"I do," Lee conceded, his anger at his pilot ebbing. Unlike anyone else who had gone to his father, Helo had expressed his concerns to him first. Lee also appreciated the fact that Helo hadn't tried to dodge the question.

"With all due respect sir, you already have enough responsibilities without routinely flying the CAPs and yet you do just as many as the rest of us, and then fill in yourself if someone has to be pulled. Everybody has a limit, and if you're not at yours yet, you're going to be soon. You look out for all of our well being, so one of us has got to look out for you and if that means going over your head to do that, I won't hesitate to do so again. I didn't mean to get your flight status revoked though, sir," Helo added at the end, as he did feel a bit guilty on that account.

Lee shook his head. "I think my attitude brought that one about," he admitted. "Along with the botched landing."

Helo nodded. "I know Crow is having a field day with that one, but messing up a routine landing like that isn't like you."

Lee sighed. The more he thought about it, the more he was starting to think that perhaps Helo, his father and whatever other pilots had gone to his father were right. Perhaps he was pushing himself too far. "I got distracted out there thinking about things other than flying. My father might be right. I might need to take a step back from the number of hours I'm putting in, in the cockpit."

"Well, you don't need to worry about the schedule. I'll take care of it," Helo told him, feeling more at ease that at least his CAG was starting to admit there was a problem. "I'll stop by your quarters and get the paperwork after I shower, if that's okay, and have it back to you by zero seven hundred. That work for you?"

"Yeah, I should be in the mess by that time in the morning," Lee told him. "But I'll leave the folder with the paperwork in your quarters for you. I got an invitation to dine with the admiral and I have a feeling if I try avoiding it, I'll have an official summons to see him tomorrow."

"Can I speak off the record for a minute, sir?"

Lee hesitated in replying. Somehow, he didn't think he was going to like the personal advice he had a feeling that Helo wanted to give. Still, his fellow pilot had shown genuine concern over his well being so far. Perhaps he needed to listen to what others had to say, given how confused and lost he had felt lately.

"Permission granted," Lee replied.

"I'm not going to pretend to understand the relationship that you have with your father. It's obvious to everyone on this ship that the two of you have your issues with one another, and personally I was close to my dad growing up. The relationship I had with him, helps ground me, even now. However, I've served under your father for quite a few years now. Everyone aboard this ship has the utmost respect for him, but I'll be the first to admit that he sets high standards and expects everyone serving under him to meet those standards. If he's like that in his personal life, I can imagine how rough it could be being his son, even before the two of you were serving on the same ship. However, everybody on this ship also knows how much he loves you and how proud he is of you. Even those of us who had never met you before, were looking forward to flying with you during the decommissioning ceremony because of what we had heard about you from Admiral Adama."

"Seriously?" Lee replied, having a hard time believing that his father would be boasting to his crew about him when he had always felt like he was a disappointment in his father's eyes. Even as he said the word though, he knew Helo was telling the truth. Yes, he had earned respect from pilots he had served with on his own merits, but that hadn't explained the response he had gotten from Chief Tyrol and the pilots onboard Galactica that he had never served with. He remembered Boomer's last message to him before he had left to escort the ship now known as Colonial 1 back to Caprica. _"It's been an honor flying with you, Apollo." _Remembering those words though, only brought back the pain of Boomer's betrayal on full force.

"I get that it's probably not easy serving in the fleet when your father's already made a name for himself, let alone now serving under him, but I think the two of you would both be better off if you cut each other a little slack. Maybe stop fighting each other and start appreciating the fact that you do both still have each other."

"Are you done?"

"Almost," Helo replied.

Lee took a deep breath and let it out slowly, not sure he was ready to hear any more blunt truth from his fellow pilot but realizing that it was probably for the best if things were all laid out now.

"Get some rest. You're still as white as a sheet," Helo told him. If he didn't know that an offer to walk with him to the admiral quarters would be rebuked, Helo would have done just that.

"Yes, sir," Lee replied lightly, giving Helo a two-finger salute as he took a step away from the wall.

As Helo turned to head back to he showers, Lee headed for his quarters. By the time he reached them, he at least felt steady on his feet, although the bed was starting to look very inviting. Still, tumbling into bed without eating something probably wasn't a good idea and he really didn't want to give his father reason to come looking for him tomorrow.

Grabbing the file from his locker, Lee left the empty quarters again and walked the short distance to Helo's quarters. The three pilots that shared the room were all out, as Lee stepped inside. Going to the top bunk that Helo used, Lee placed the file most of the way under the pillow and left the room. With a feeling of dread, he headed toward his father's quarters, not at all feeling up to another verbal sparring match with the older man.

_~It's just one meal. Surely we can get through it civilly, ~ _Lee told himself, as he knocked on the door to his father's quarters.

Within moments of knocking, the hatch was being pulled open. "I was starting to think you weren't going to show," William Adama said in a way of a greeting. After he got a good look at his son, his tone softened. "Are you feeling okay, son?"

"It's just been a long day," Lee replied, not about to tell his father about the earlier dizzy spell. He was sure his father would have him off duty and not just on stand-down from flying CAP if he knew about that episode.

"And you probably haven't eaten much today, either," William said, motioning Lee into the room. "I know I haven't. So let's get some food into you before I go rushing you down to medbay."

~_Apparently I look worse than I feel, _~ Lee thought as he walked over to the table where his father had already set two places.

The meal started off quietly. Not only wasn't Lee in the mood to talk, but he also didn't want to say or do anything that would cause his father to be more concerned about him. The last thing he needed was his flight status completely revoked. So instead of even trying to make small talk, Lee kept his eyes focused on the plate in front of him and ate at a moderate place - wanting to get the meal over with but not wanting to appear in a hurry.

Across the table from Lee, William was quiet as he contemplated the situation. He had been going over the situation down on the flight deck, trying to figure out how the conversation had gone so wrong. Raised voices and ultimatums had not been what he had gone down there for, though maybe he should have expected it. Probably 90 percent of his conversations with Lee ended with those results. Maybe he had been a fool to think it would have been any different this time around. That he could actually express concern for his son's well being and have Lee accept that at face value.

William was genuinely concerned for his son. He had been even before Kara, Helo, and two other pilots had come to him with their own concerns. He'd been more distant than usual and quieter. When Kara had voiced her concerns he had gotten the feeling Lee had told her more than she was relaying to him. The other three pilots had expressed concern over his change in temperament, while Helo had also added the excessive work hours as reason for concern. Given what he had seen on the flight deck, along with how pale Lee had been when he had showed up tonight, William felt the concerns were valid. The question was though, how did he reach his son?

"If you felt like I was ambushing you down on the flight deck that wasn't my intent," William Adama finally said, breaking the silence and hoping to break the ice as well.

Lee looked up from his plate. "I wasn't thinking that," he replied, trying to keep his voice calm.

"Are you sure? You went immediately on the defensive down there, just like you're doing now."

"I'm not . . ." Lee let his protest drift off, knowing his father was correct. He had immediately gone on the defensive the moment his father had spoke to him on the flight deck. Of course, he had been doing that for so long now that it was like second nature to him. He wasn't sure why and he wasn't about to explore that avenue with his father right now. "Look, you took me by surprise earlier," he said, hoping he could come up with an explanation that would satisfy his father, "and I may have over reacted. I guess I let my wounded ego do the talking."

William stabbed a piece of meat from his plate with his fork. "That was more than just wounded pride from a botched landing," William ventured. His gut told him there was more to it than that.

"Can we just drop it?"

The question was the closest Lee had gotten to admitting that there even was an issue. To William, that was progress. His first instinct was to do as Lee requested and pursue this conversation at a later time. If he did that though, William knew he would have to start at the beginning once again with getting through the walls that Lee put up. Walls that had only seemed to get higher since they had left the colonies. So, ignoring that first instinct, Galactica's commander pushed on.

"So, you do admit something else is going on?"

Lee sighed, dropping his fork on his plate.

"Bottling things up inside isn't healthy. You can talk to me, you know?"

"Can I?" Lee asked, the bitterness clear, even to his own ears. "Because you've always been there for me in the past, right? It was someone else who abandoned his family when his oldest son was eight years old?"

"Your mother was part of the decision for us to divorce and I elected to let her have custody of you and your brother because she could provide you with a more stable home than I could."

Lee let out another sigh. "I don't even know why I brought this up. It's in the past. It can't be changed."

"No, it can't be changed, but maybe we do need to talk about. Perhaps we should have talked about it a long time ago. You tell me, Lee, because right now I feel like I'm losing you for a third time and I don't like that feeling. I don't want something to happen that it may have been in my power to prevent."

"Kara told you what I said, didn't she?" Lee accused, giving up on all pretense of trying to remain calm. "I figured she was one of the pilots to express concern over me but I didn't think she would tell you something I told her in confidence!" he exclaimed, getting quickly to his feet.

"Lee, sit back down, please," William requested calmly, even as his son turned to head for the door.

Lee didn't have a chance to comply with the request, even if he had wanted to, as the sudden movement had caused another bout of dizziness to sweep over him. His world started spinning around him, as the viper pilot reached out frantically for the chair he had just vacated.

"Lee!"

His father shouting his name was the last thing Lee heard as he felt darkness close in.


	4. Late Night

As she quickly typed in the last bit of code, Rebecca felt some of the tension leaving her shoulders. Saving the changes, she was confidence at least that their computer systems were once again secure. The firewall had been reestablished on the computers of both ships and added security measures had been put in place. What concerned her though was that the failed firewall hadn't been a simple case of a computer glitch. Someone had gotten into the system and rewrote the code.

"That should do it," Rebecca commented to PO Easton as the saving process completed. "Did the security check turn up any other issues?"

Easton shook her head. "No, everything else checked out fine."

"That's good to hear," Rebecca said, relieved to hear that there were no other security breeches. "I do however want Astral Ore and Cloud Six to run a security check on their systems, paying close attention to communications, just to be safe," she added.

Though the two colonial battlestars ran weekly checks on the computer systems since the Cylon attack on the colonies, the two civilian ships only did monthly checks. The discovered security breech however had Rebecca concerned, and as Colonel Cruise had appointed her to oversee computer security over the fleet, she wanted to be sure the breech didn't extend beyond the two military ships.

Ana Easton nodded in response. "I'll take care of it," the petty officer assured her, looking over at Rebecca. "You've been working all day and I'm at least use to pulling the overnight shift. It'll give me something to do tonight. I'll also start backtracking changes in the system to see when the system was modified and if they left any electronic footprints for us to trace."

Rebecca nodded her consent. As tired as she was, she knew she ran the risk of missing something if she continued working tonight. Besides she had a little girl to get in bed. It was way past Laura Jean's bed time now.

Glancing around CIC, Rebecca soon spotted Colonel Cruise. The ship's commanding officer was slowly walking around the perimeter of the room, Laura now in his arms instead of tagging along. The little girl's head was resting on the colonel's shoulder and Rebecca wondered if her daughter hadn't already fallen asleep.

"What time does your watch end?" Rebecca asked, getting to her feet.

"Zero seven hundred."

"I'll make sure I check in with you before the end of your shift," Rebecca assured her, wondering if the day with her daughter was going to be ruined after all. Still, the security of the fleet needed to take priority as she had no intention of tomorrow being the last birthday Laura Jean celebrated.

"Okay. Goodnight, Rebecca," Ana replied, turning back to the console in front of her even before Rebecca had a chance to echo the good-bey.

Leaving the station she had been working at, Rebecca made her way in Colonel Cruise's direction. Approaching the two of them, she could see that despite resting her head, Laura Jean was still awake. As she got closer, she heard the colonel softly reciting an old fable that her own father use to tell her as a child.

"Sneaking more stories out of people I see," Rebecca accused her daughter lightly, as she approached the duo.

"I helped Mr. Cruise finish his work early, mama," Laura Jean replied, lifting her head from the colonel's shoulder.

"Sure you did," Rebecca replied, wondering how much Pisus' commanding officer actually got done.

"She hasn't been any trouble at all," Colonel Randall Cruise assured Rebecca. "Though I'm surprised, I could remember the fables my mother used to tell me as a child. It's been awhile."

"How old are you?" Laura Jean asked. "I'm turn'n two."

"You are?" Randall replied in feigned surprise. "Happy Birthday then, but you've got quite a long time before you'll catch up to me," he told her. Looking from the little girl to her mother, Randall's voice became more serious. "Did you fix the security issue?"

Rebecca nodded. "I reestablished the firewall and created an extra layer of security. I've also changed the access codes again for the system, sir," she reported. "Petty Officer Easton will be able to provide them to you. It wasn't just a computer glitch or error in the code. The code was rewritten."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive. Though each computer language has its own set of symbols and rules that need to be followed, there is room for a programmer to add their own personal style to the code. I know how I write code, and the code controlling the security parameters for the communications program has been changed recently. Easton's going to start looking into when the change took place as well as make sure there wasn't a similar breech on the two civilian ships. Until we can find out who changed the code, I recommend limiting access to the system to very few people."

Colonel Cruise nodded. "For now we'll limit access to you, Easton, myself and Ensign Hendricks on the Ares," the colonel said. Ensign Hendricks was the head computer specialist on the Ares that department having been staffed by all trainees on what should have been a simple training mission. "Is that limited enough for you?"

"Yes," Rebecca replied, glad that the Colonel was taking her suggestion seriously. "Easton is going to start an investigation into tracking down who made the changes tonight. I'll take over from her in the morning-"

"No, you won't. You've been granted leave and you're not going to change those plans. Easton can bring Ensign Hendricks up to speed on the situation in the morning."

"With all due respect sir, a breech in our communications could mean that someone within this fleet is or is preparing to leak information to the Cylons. It could be why we haven't seen any Raiders for a while."

"I'm well aware of the implications of this situation, but the immediate threat has been neutralized thanks to you insistence of these weekly checks," Colonel Cruise replied, his voice becoming more authoritative despite the low volume, as he was aware of the sleepy little girl still in his arms. Though the little girl wouldn't be able to completely follow their conversation, Randall Cruise was well aware that she may pick up on the mood of the conversation. He also didn't want to give Laura the impression that he was yelling at her mother. "I know finding the person behind the breech is important, but I also believe that both Easton and Hendricks are qualified to begin that investigation. I'll make sure there is a progress report waiting for you by eighteen hundred hours tomorrow."

"Yes, sir," Rebecca replied, not really having the desire to press the point further. As much as she wanted to track down the person who had breeched the security measures that had been set up, she also didn't want to disappoint her daughter. Her daughter deserved at least one day of her undivided attention despite the current state of the world they were living in.

"So, I still get my surprise?" Laura Jean interjected, easing the tension of the conversation.

Rebecca found herself smiling at the question despite the seriousness of the situation.

Randall looked from the fleet's computer specialist to the little girl in his arms. "Yes, you still get your surprise, though you need to promise to tell me all about it the first chance you get," he told her.

"I will," Laura Jean replied solemnly.

"Good," Randall replied easily, as he handed Laura off to her mother.

The sleepy two-year-old immediately rested her head on her mother's shoulder, content once more now that she knew she would still get her birthday surprise.

"I'm serious, the investigation can get started without you," Colonel Randall said, seeing the hesitation on Rebecca's face. "Maybe it's about time we all stopped just getting through tomorrow and start living again."

Rebecca nodded not knowing what else to say. With Laura Jean already falling asleep in her arms, she started for the door. She was just about to step through when Colonel Cruise called her name. Stopping she turned back to face him.

"Your father would have been proud of you these past six months," Colonel Cruise told her. "Even though you refused the commission, you've been everything an officer is expected to be and more. You've definitely lived up to the Tyree name."

Rebecca blinked back tears at the words knowing that Colonel Cruise had served with her father until he took the position as the Pisus' XO two months before the Cylon attack. If anyone would have known what her father would think of whom she had become since the colonies were attacked, it was Randall Cruise.

"Thank-you sir."

"And for the record, he was proud of you for following your heart and doing what you wanted after leaving the service. He told me that himself, on more than one occasion. We even had a bet on whether the RECT System would actually work or not. I'm embarrassed to say, I would have lost, but I can guarantee you I'll never bet against you again."

"Probably the smartest decision you ever made, sir," Rebecca replied flippantly, not sure how else to respond to the colonel's honest praise.

Colonel Cruise laughed. "Goodnight," he told her.

"Goodnight, sir," Rebecca replied, turning again and finally leaving CIC, feeling happier than she had in quite awhile. Perhaps Colonel Cruise was right. Maybe the true secret to their little fleet surviving was all of them learning to live again, instead of just meeting basic needs. Tomorrow she planned to give the suggestion a try, for her daughter's sake if nothing else.

* * *

_Once again he found himself in the serene landscape of the Caprica Woodlands. The government run park, covered hundreds of acres only a few miles outside of Caprica City. Though his mother had taken him and Zak there a few times in his childhood, it was only in recent years that he had become a regular frequenter of the park when on Caprica. Rebecca loved being out of the city and in the more peaceful surroundings the park provided, and he had discovered that he could be happy anywhere that she was by his side._

_The open grassland by the creek was a favorite spot of theirs, and as he walked across it, he could see the two familiar figures in the distance. The sun glinted off the light brown hair, as the two walked beside the creek hand-in-hand. He called out to them, but neither of them looked in his direction. Quickening his footsteps, he tried to close the distance between them but though they didn't appear to be walking any faster, try as he might, he couldn't get closer to them. They were the two most important people in his life and he couldn't reach them._

"_Rebecca! Laura!" he called out. He might have well-been whispering for all the good his shouting was doing._

"Lee?"

Like a fog drifting in, the familiar parkland faded away to grey. Slowly, he became aware of a dull aching in his head. The last thing he needed was a headache with everything he had to do but perhaps getting one shouldn't really be a surprise to him. He was definitely stressed out enough that he was surprised he didn't constantly have one.

The greyness faded away as he opened his eyes to find indoor surroundings. As real as the park scene had been, he knew it had been a dream. Saying good-bye to Rebecca and Laura at the spaceport as they were about to board a transport to Picon was the last time he had seen his wife and daughter. Though he hadn't known it then, that was the last time he would ever see them. Like his mother in Caprica City and so many others, Rebecca and Laura had probably been killed when the Cylons attacked Picon.

Lee felt pressure on his left hand as he heard his father's voice say his name again. Slowly, he turned his head in that direction, realizing as he did so that he was in Galactica's medbay and not his quarters. He tried to recall how he got here. He remembered going to his father's quarters to eat and then . . .

"How are you feeling, son?" William Adama asked, a gentleness in his voice that wasn't often there. He still grasped Lee's hand firmly in his own.

"Tired and my head hurts," Lee admitted, still trying to recall how he ended up in medbay. It didn't seem to want to come to him.

"Given the bruise you've got, that second part doesn't surprise me," William replied, even as he reached for the button to summon the medical staff. Dr. Cottle hadn't returned to his quarters after being summoned to medbay when Lee had been brought in as he wanted to evaluate Lee when he woke up.

Lee barely heard him as he went through the events of the evening. He had gone to his father's quarters after talking with Helo. Like usual, the conversation with his father had quickly gotten tense. He remembered his father saying something that made him think Kara had told his father about his admission of not wanting to come back from the mission with the Blackbird. He wasn't sure where the conversation had gone from there.

"I'm not suicidal," Lee said, now convinced that his father was thinking that thanks to Kara.

"No one said you were," William said, confused. He wasn't sure how the conversation had taken that turn.

"At least no more than other workaholics I've met," Dr. Cottle interjected in a no nonsense tone as he stepped up to the bedside.

Lee turned his head so he could see the new arrival, wincing as the movement made his head ache worse.

"I'll have the nurse give you something for the pain momentarily," Dr. Cottle added, having noticed the sign of pain in his patient. "I've got a few things I want to check first though, now that you seem to be fully coherent," the gruff old doctor added. "First things first, name, rank and serial number."

"What is this, an interrogation?" Lee asked.

"No, part of my neuro-check procedure. I want to make sure you didn't do more than just give yourself a nasty bruise when you decided to do a face-plant in the Admiral's quarters," Cottle replied dryly. "Of course we could just skip all the easy stuff and I'll just run every possible test I can think of to rule out a possible head injury. Could take me hours, or even days if I have enough interruptions."

"Has anyone ever told your bedside manner could use with some improvement?"

Dr. Cottle shrugged. "At this point, I'm too old to care," the doctor replied. "Not to mention, I don't exactly have much competition around. I'm in high demand, I don't need a good bedside manner and you still haven't answered my question."

"Captain Leland Adama. Serial number 318742."

"You forgot your middle name."

"You've got to be frakking kidding me."

Dr. Cottle let his mouth turn up in a small smile. "Just giving you a hard time," he replied, dryly before continuing his assessment of his patient.

"Well," Dr. Cottle said about ten minutes later after completing his assessment. "I don't see any reason to run more tests although I do plan on keeping you here for observation for a bit. It'll also ensure that you get some proper rest, which you need. We're not machines, captains. Our bodies need proper food, hydration and rest to function properly and that fainting spell was your body's way of telling you that you've been neglecting it. Stress from recent events probably isn't helping anything either."

"Well I can't exactly run off for a day at the beach now can I," Lee countered.

"If you have a good enough imagination, you could," the doctor countered without missing a beat. "Even if you don't, taking time for yourself and relaxing will help. As would finding someone to talk to. We all need a support system, and from what I've seen, you haven't exactly found yourself one yet, Captain. You need to change that or I might have to try recalling what I learned in my psychology class back in college and believe me, there was a reason I didn't make that my specialty."

"I'll keep that in mind," Lee told him.

Dr. Cottle nodded curtly, obviously not pleased with the answer but willing to accept it for now. "I want to leave the IV in for now, in case another round of IV fluids is necessary, we won't have to stick you again. Right now though, I think it's all time we got some sleep around here," the doctor said, glancing at the elder Adama with those words. "I know I'm looking forward to getting back to my rack." The veteran doctor let his gaze drift back to his patient. "And you better stay put. You need something my staff is at your call but I don't want to hear about you giving them a hard time. You hear me?"

"Loud and clear, doctor," Lee replied. Though thoughts of a 'jail break' after the doctor had left had entered his mind, he was quickly changing his mind. The last thing he wanted to do was get on Dr. Cottle's bad side as he would need the man's clearance to return to duty.

"Good. Good night gentlemen and remember I have other patients trying to sleep so keep any arguments down to a low roar," Dr. Cottle said, before turning and heading for the head night shift nurse.

Lee closed his eyes, chagrined at the knowledge that his problems with his father were so well known aboard ship. He didn't want things to be that way, and he doubted his father did either, but the two of them just couldn't figure out how to relate to one another.

The pair was silent after the doctor left, both lost in their own thoughts. The arrival of a nurse broke the silence. The nurse helped Lee take a couple of pills to help his headache, like Dr. Cottle had promised, and then was gone.

A few moments later, William Adama finally spoke.

"Lee, I'm sorry."

Lee looked slowly in his father's direction. He had been about to suggest that his father go to his quarters to rest himself, but the suggestion was forgotten about as he tried to figure out what his father was getting at.

"What?" Lee asked, the confusion and surprise clear in his voice.

"I'm sorry for my part in this," William expounded, needing to express the guilt he had felt ever since he had watch Lee collapse in his quarters. "I know I'm a part of the stress you're under, though I'm really not trying to be. I shouldn't have pressed so much. It's just that I'm worried about you."

"Because of what Kara told you I said?" Lee ventured. He really didn't feel up to another attempt at a personal conversation with his father, but he needed to know if Kara had repeated his admission to his father.

A look of confusion came over William's face. "Kara didn't tell me you told her anything," he replied. "All she said was that she worried about you and that I needed to do something, even if I had to pull rank to accomplish that. She's really worried about you, son." There was a pause filled only by the soft murmurs that were routine to the medbay at this time of night. "I'm worried about you, son. Even more now than I was earlier this evening."

Lee closed his eyes wishing he hadn't said anything. Once again all he had managed to do were make things worse. Dr. Cottle was probably right, he did need to talk to someone but he didn't exactly have a lot of choices of who. Though he had gotten to know his shipmates these past six months, he didn't feel close enough to them to bare his heart. There was Kara, but the fact that he was her superior now made things awkward, even with their friendship. His father seemed like the most practical choice.

At least with some things. Lee refused to mention Rebecca or Laura Jean to his father now. It was bad enough he had kept the facts that he had a grandchild from his father for as long as he did. Lee wasn't about to bring it up now that his father had no hope of ever knowing his granddaughter. At the very least he could spare his father that grief.

Opening his eyes, Lee stared up at the ceiling as he spoke, unable to look over at his father. "There was a part of me that didn't want to come back after I ejected from the Blackbird. When death seemed inevitable, it seemed like an escape. An end to the running, the guilt, and the endless wonder about who is going to be next. Letting everything go seemed so much easier than trying to go on."

Lee felt his father grab a hold of his hand again. The pressure seemed almost like an anchor, grounding him in the swirl of emotions that was raging within. Turning his head slowly, Lee chanced a look at his father and the emotions he saw there were as varied as those he felt.

"Not that I'm out looking to end things," Lee insisted, wanting to convince his father that he wasn't suicidal.

"You just didn't see the point in fighting against death when it seemed like the only way to finally find some sense of peace," William said quietly, putting a voice to the feeling that Lee was having trouble expressing.

"Yes," Lee managed to get out, surprised that his father had echoed his feelings. Perhaps his father understood when Kara hadn't seemed to. "How did you. . ."

"I felt that way myself after being shot," William Adama admitted. He may have talked to Dee about some things following his return to command, but there were some things that he hadn't told anyone. Things that he figured he would never admit to another living soul but hearing his son talking about the same thing, he knew it was time to make that confession. Perhaps they weren't so different after all. "With all the pain and what I knew I would be coming back to, I started wondering if it was really worth the fight. Giving up seemed like the easier option. Then, and I don't know if it was real or I imagined it, but I heard your voice. I couldn't make out what was said, but I knew that I didn't want to just give up with things left the way they were between us. You're the reason I fought to come back. You saved me, Lee, and I want to help you now but you've got to let me."

Lee swallowed hard, trying to push aside the emotions that his father's words were evoking. He knew his father was right in that given the way things were. They needed to find a reason to keep going. For each person that would be different and Lee knew he hadn't found his reason yet. He kept going because he was doing his duty, but that wasn't enough. The problem was, he had already lost his reason to keep going. He might cling to the photograph he carried, but he had no real hope of ever seeing his little girl again.

But if he was the reason his father kept pushing on through everything, than shouldn't his father be enough of a reason for him to keep going?

Seeing Lee's struggle with his emotions, William was concerned once again that he might be pushing his son too far. Reaching out, he rested the hand not holding onto his son's, carefully on Lee's forehead, avoiding the bruised area.

"I think the doctor's right, it is getting late," William said softly. "Why don't we continue this another time?" he added, cringing at the words. He finally got Lee to open up to him some, and here he was seemingly pushing him away again. It wasn't like that this time though. "Unless, you really need to get something out now," he amended, hoping to convey the right message to Lee.

"I am kind of tired," Lee admitted, grateful that his Dad had given him an out. He didn't have it in him to continue this conversation right now.

"We'll pick this up when you're ready, then," Bill said, smiling as he lifted his hand from his son's forehead, but still holding onto Lee's hand.

"Do you plan on staying here all night?" Lee asked, realizing his father was in no hurry to leave.

"Just until you fall asleep again. Unless you want me to stay?"

"No, you need to get some sleep as well," Lee replied, uncertain of what he really wanted. Part of him didn't want to be alone right then, while another part of him was concerned for his Dad's well being. Sleep or no sleep, Lee knew his father would be carrying out his duties come the morning.

That being said, Lee closed his eyes, willing the peacefulness of sleep to claim him from the storm of emotions he was dealing with right now. Though he would never admit it to anyone, the pressure of his father's hand holding his had a calming effect on him and gave him a sense of security despite their present circumstances.


	5. A Special Day

Lee let out a sigh of relief as the medic moved on to another patient. He knew she was just doing her job, but what he really wanted was to get out of medbay, something that he knew wasn't going to happen for a while yet. At least he had been allowed to change back into his fatigues. The normal clothing made him feel much less self-conscious and he had been able to assure himself that the photo had not been lost.

He hadn't been alone long though, when the curtains that Lee had asked the medic to pull closed around his bed, shifted and Helo poked his head through. "Up for a visitor, Captain?" the pilot asked.

"Come in, Helo," Lee replied, a bit surprised to see his pilot. He had thought it would take at least until midmorning for the fact that he was in medbay to get around the ship but apparently he had been wrong in that estimation.

Helo stepped through the part in the curtain and walked to the foot of the bed. "You're looking better than you did last night when I was down here," the pilot commented. "Except for the bruise, I think that got worse."

"You were down here last night?" Lee asked, trying to remember if he recalled seeing him. He was sure he had only spoken to his father and Dr. Cottle.

"Yeah, I don't think it was too long after you were brought in. The commander called me down here to let me know I'd need to take care of the morning briefing as Starbuck wouldn't be back from CAP yet. She's not going to be happy to hear she's got to fill in for you after being out on patrol all night, you know."

Lee smiled. "I'm glad I'm not the one that has to break that news to her," he admitted.

"True, but you do realize she's going to find you here very easily."

"Yes, but you see at least down here if she gets too . . . ," Lee paused for a moment searching for the right word before continuing, ". . . animated, I can always pull the 'she's disturbing the patient' card."

"I think I'm going to be happy I'm out on CAP today," Helo said with a chuckle.

"You're flying CAP?" Lee asked, knowing that he had given Helo the day off when he had done the schedule as it had been at least a week since the raptor pilot had not been on either CAP or alert status.

"Someone had to take your spot in the rotation and despite the fact that you don't seem to take advantage of it. I am rated to fly Vipers."

"I've really managed to screw things up," Lee said, leaning his head back against the pillows and closing his eyes. He felt like he was letting his pilots down.

"We'll be fine, sir," Helo replied, trying to sound sure of that fact. They were all going to putting in extra time with two pilots out of the rotation for a few days but the last thing he wanted to do was make Lee feel worse than he already did. "Just follow the doctor's orders so he actually lets you out here. Maybe if I had stepped in sooner-"

"This isn't your fault," Lee interjected, lifting his head from the pillow.

"Isn't it?" Helo asked, not about to let himself off the hook so easily. "I knew you were overdoing it. I should've done something about it."

"You did, remember?"

"Apparently not enough. You didn't look well last night when we were talking. I shouldn't have let you go off on your own."

"You're not responsible for my choices, Helo. If I remember correctly, you did tell me to get some rest last night. Perhaps I should have just skipped dinner with the old man and climbed in my rack, but I didn't. That was my choice though."

Though he nodded, Lee didn't think Helo looked too convinced. ~_Apparently he isn't going to let himself off the hook that easily, ~ _Lee thought. It was something Lee could understand because he knew if their places were reversed, he'd feel the same way.

"Isn't it about time for the morning briefing?" Lee asked, mostly as a way to break the awkward silence that had descended upon them.

"Yeah, it is, but it's not like the CAG is going to be there to get on my case if I walk in a few minutes late," Helo joked lightly.

"You don't have to rub it in," Lee replied, trying not to smile.

"Yes, sir," Helo replied, giving a sloppy salute to Lee before growing serious again. "Seriously though, what do you want me to tell them about why you're not there?" the Raptor pilot asked.

"Tell them the truth," Lee answered without any hesitation. "Tell them that I've been pushing myself too hard and landed in medbay." He had been in the military long enough to know that being vague and trying to keep things quiet would only result in rumors spreading wild. If his crew mates were going to talk about him, he'd prefer to have it be accurate.

"Okay," Helo said, not at all surprised by the response. "I should probably get going so I'm not too late for that morning briefing," he added, lightly. Helo paused for a moment before continuing. "Sir, make sure you listen to the doctor so he doesn't keep you in here. I'm not sure I want to deal with Starbuck as CAG for too, long."

Lee smiled. "I'm not sure I want to let her be CAG for too long, because my paperwork is backing up as it is."

Helo chuckled as he turned and left. Alone once again, Lee leaned back against the pillows. The last place he wanted to be was in medbay with nothing to do but think. He was having enough trouble thinking about things that he didn't want to with work to occupy him. Lee knew hiding from those thoughts within the confines of medbay would be even harder. However, Helo had a point. If he didn't follow Dr. Cottle's instructions, the doctor would take pleasure in not only not releasing him for duty but keeping him confined to medbay.

* * *

"Mama, you done yet?" Laura Jean asked impatiently as she sat at a table in the mess hall with her mother. The bowl in front of the little girl had already been emptied.

"Almost, sweetheart," Rebecca replied, smiling at her daughter's enthusiasm even though she hadn't yet told Laura Jean what she had planned for the two of them, knowing that it would have only added to the two-year-old's excitement.

As it was, despite the late night, the little girl had gotten up early, waking her mother up well before the alarm had gone off. Rebecca was relieved to be able to coax the little girl into laying down with her. Even the extra half hour nap she had managed was welcomed. Given that they were leaving the Pisus, Rebecca knew she had to stall Laura Jean until the scheduled departure time and thus lingering over an extra up of coffee became not only necessary, but an easy way to drag out their time in the mess hall.

Rebecca did not miss the pout on Laura Jean's face as she raised her coffee cup. She was in the process of taking a long sip from the mug, when Jania approached their table.

"I was hoping I hadn't missed you," Jania said, stepping into the space between Rebecca and Laura Jean's chairs. The teenager had one hand hidden behind her back.

"Mama's in slow m'tion today," Laura Jean replied cheerily from her seat.

Jania smiled at Laura Jean's honest and innocent reply. Looking toward her employer, Rebecca just shrugged her shoulders as she placed the cup on the table.

"What's up?" Rebecca asked, the fingers of her right-hand still gripping the coffee mug for the time being. She didn't plan on letting its contents go to waste, unless absolutely necessary.

"I just wanted to give the birthday girl her present," Jania said, taking her hand from behind her back and revealing a flat package wrapped in homemade wrapping paper. Jania placed the package on the table next to the empty bowl.

"For me?" Laura Jean asked, her bright eyes and smiling face looking up to Jania.

"I don't see any other birthday girls," Jania told her charge.

The two older women watched with smiles as Laura Jean pushed the empty bowl off to the side and pulled the package closer to her. Within seconds the homemade wrapping paper had been torn, away revealing another hand-crafted item.

"It's a book!" Laura Jean exclaimed, flipping open the cover.

"That's right," Jania said, squatting down so that she was closer to Laura Jean's level as she spoke. "I know you've enjoyed some of the bedtime stories I've made up for you so I thought I'd try my hand at putting one down in a book for a very special girl I know."

Laura Jean left the book opened on the table, and flung her arms around Jania. "Thank-you" the little girl said.

"You're welcome," Jania replied, returning the hug. The little girl's enthusiasm was worth every minute put into making the book.

Meanwhile, Rebecca had pulled the book closer to her so that she could look at it. The words on the pages were neatly written in good sized letters. Every few pages, an adequately drawn scene depicted a moment in the story being told.

"This is really well done," Rebecca commented, sliding the book back to her daughter as Laura Jean released Jania.

"I'm not the best artist but at least the pictures are recognizable I think."

"They're fine," Rebecca assured her. "Thank-you for helping to make her birthday special, Jania. You're amazing. I don't know what I would have done these last few months without your help."

"It's been my pleasure," Jania replied, standing up. "Now, I'm going to disappear and let the two of you enjoy the rest of the day together."

"Are you sure you won't join us?" Rebecca asked softly, though Laura Jean was absorbed in looking through the book even if she couldn't read the words yet.

"No. This should be just the two of you. Besides, I've got another project to occupy my time."

"Care to share?"

"I've been trying to write a novel," Jania admitted softly, ducking her head. "I've always enjoyed writing children's tales but I thought I might take a stab at something more grown-up."

"I'm impressed," Rebecca replied. "If you would care to share it when it's done, I'd love to read it. Reading something I haven't read before would be a nice change."

"We'll see how it turns out," Jania replied, clearing unsure of the idea. She turned from her employer to Laura Jean. "You have fun today and I'll see you for dinner," she told the little girl.

"I will! Thanks," Laura Jean replied, smiling up at Jania.

Rebecca downed the rest of her coffee as Jania walked away from their table. "Are you ready then?" she asked her daughter.

Laura Jean nodded, closing the book. As fascinating as the book was, the lure of finding out what her other surprise was still remained. As she slid off of her chair, Rebecca gathered their empty breakfast dishes and stood up. After depositing the dirty dishes in the appropriate place, Rebecca reached down for her daughter's hand and led the way out of the ship's mess.

Mother and daughter walked through the corridors of the ship which were now starting to come alive with activity. Laura Jean's youthful 'hi' echoed in the corridors every time they passed someone. Without fail, the crew of the Pisus returned the cheerful greeting, some form of smile coming to even the most hard core military personnel, even if only for a moment.

"Are we leaving the ship?" Laura Jean asked, as mother and daughter approached the Pisus' starboard hangar bay.

"Yes we are, sweetheart," Rebecca replied. "We're going to spend the day in the park on Cloud Six. That sounds like a good way to spend your birthday, doesn't it?"

"Yes!" Laura Jean exclaimed, her steps taking on a little bounce as they continued on.

Rebecca felt a wave of relief seep through her. It wasn't easy these days to make something special. Mostly they were all just trying to survive. However, she had wanted to make her daughter's second birthday a happy break from their normal routine. There was so much she couldn't give her daughter - an extravagant gift, a proper school, a normal childhood, her father - but she was hoping the day in the artificial park of Cloud Six would bring her daughter joy. Though it was still early, it appeared as though she was going to be able to accomplish that.

Within minutes, the two were walking into the landing bay. Though not as active as it was at other times, the flight deck was alive with activity. A group of flight mechanics huddled around Pisus' Chief, listening to the plan for the day. The pilots preparing to take over the CAP were at their Vipers with the designated flight mechanics going over pre-flight procedures.

Rebecca was easily able to spot the promised Raptor that would be ready to take her and her daughter over to Cloud Six. As she started to lead Laura Jean in that direction though, Rebecca was surprised by the pilot who was standing next to the Raptor.

"Please tell me this doesn't mean my shore leave has been revoked?" Rebecca queried as she approached Pisus' CAG.

"Now, Phoenix, would I do that and disappoint that little princess there," Colonel Raymond Belmont replied, pointing to Laura Jean.

"These days, nothing would surprise me," Rebecca replied.

"Well, relax because I'm not here to revoke shore leave. Someone else is just going to have to deal with Hothead's behavior today," Belmont assured her. "I just decided to take advantage of my position as CAG, and keep the privilege of escorting you two lovely ladies to Cloud Six to myself," the former retired colonel said.

Belmont knelt down on the flight deck and held out a cloth rose he had been holding to Laura Jean. "And for the birthday girl, a birthday rose," he said, smiling as he addressed the little girl.

Giggling, Laura Jean took the fabric flower from Belmont.

"What no kiss?" Belmont asked playfully, pretending to pout. "I remember a time when a gentleman got a kiss when he gave a pretty girl a flower."

Still giggling, Laura Jean took a couple steps closer to the CAG and then placed a quick kiss on Belmont's cheek.

"Now that's more like it," Belmont replied.

"Lonewolf, I do believe you are getting soft in your old age," Rebecca replied, smiling at the scene unfolding before her. The image of the older pilot presenting a fabric rose to a little girl did not fit with the memory of the gruff, no-nonsense, strict flight instructor who had greeted her the first day of Basic Flight so many years ago.

"Perhaps I am," Belmont replied, slowly getting to his feet once more. "However, you try spreading it around among the other pilots and I will deny it with my dying breath."

"No one would believe me any ways," Rebecca assured him.

"You're probably right," Belmont agreed. He hadn't gotten his call sign, Lonewolf, for no reason.

Raymond Belmont had spent his early years in the military keeping to himself and doing his job. Later, he chose to keep a distance between himself and those who served under him, offering advice and encouragement without coddling the younger pilots. It had been his way of protecting himself from the inevitable loses that came with their chosen lifestyle. It wasn't until later in his career, when his twenty-year-old daughter had found him and told him he was a grandfather that he had really started letting anyone in. A year after that event, he had retired wanting to experience his granddaughter's childhood and get to know his daughter. Still, he hadn't been able to leave flying completely behind and as his daughter lived on Picon, Raymond had found himself consulting with the Colonial Ship Development Department. When he had heard about the trial run of the RECT System, he had wanted to be there first hand to watch the trials.

Then the Cylons had attacked. Though he felt helpless in regards to the family he had left down on Picon, Raymond Belmont had seen the need around him. Pisus' depleted Viper squadron consisted of those without the sonority to have drawn shore leave during the ship's current mission. Though quite capable of carrying out the routine duties required while the experiment's were taken place, the Cylon attack had sent a ripple of panic through the pilots. Though retired, Belmont had stepped in and took charge, organizing the chaos and leading the pilots in the defense of the two ships as they quickly fled the area surrounding Picon. The day after the attack on the colonies, Raymond Belmont had officially been reinstated into the Colonial Fleet by Colonel Cruise and appointed Pisus' CAG.

"Now ladies, if you would step this way, your chariot awaits," Belmont continued, making a sweeping gesture toward the Raptor behind him.

Taking Laura Jean's hand once more, Rebecca led the way onto the readied Raptor.

"Mama, can we start my book on the way?" Laura Jean asked.

"Sure, sweetie," Rebecca replied, wondering how her CAG was going to feel about hearing a child's book read. Then she thought about the scene that had just taken place outside and realized he probably wouldn't mind at all. Though all she had seen while on duty was the same hardcore flight instructor who had taught her to fly a Viper, she knew now that there was a whole other side to the man that she didn't know at all.


	6. A Truth Revealed

_AN: So, it's been awhile since I updated this, so I hope there is still interest. Feedback is always welcomed!_

* * *

Despite how late it had been when he had finally departed medbay, William Adama had started his day just as early as he usually did. The only deviance to his normal routine being that he had allowed was stopping by medbay to check on Lee. At the early hour he had stopped by, Lee had still been sleeping and he hadn't wakened him. However, the brief visit had assured him that Lee was in no immediate danger. He had hoped that would allow him to concentrate on his job without any personal distractions.

As he walked from CIC to medbay at the lunch hour, William had to admit that he had only been partially successful in that last endeavor. More than once, when things had been slow in the command center, Galactica's commander had found himself thinking about what little information he had gotten from Lee the night before and how he could go about helping him. It wasn't like he could pull on past experiences of fatherhood for guidance now. As he had admitted to Lee, his own father had personified that title so much better than he himself had. He had left so much of the parenting up to Carolanne when it came to their sons, but she wasn't here now. He was the only family Lee had, and vice versa. Uncharted waters or not, William knew he couldn't run away from trying to help his son through this low point in his life.

_~I've just got to figure out exactly what the problem or problems are, ~ _William thought, as he approached medbay.

Walking through the doorway, William didn't bother taking notice of the noise and activity taken place. He had come here to see Lee, and that was where his focus was. He started toward the curtained off area where his son had been this morning, only to be headed off by Dr. Cottle.

"Hold up. I need to talk to you a moment," the doctor said gruffly as he rolled an unlit cigarette in between three fingers of his right hand.

"Lee-"

"Calm down, it's nothing too serious," Dr. Cottle interrupted before the admiral managed to actually ask any questions. ~_Why did people always jump to the worst conclusions when a doctor said they wanted to talk anyway? ~_ the doctor asked silently. Out loud he said, "if he takes after you, it's no wonder he managed to work himself up to panic attack. "Perhaps you need to take some time off yourself, Admiral," he suggested gruffly, venting his frustrations.

"I'm not your patient right now, doctor," the Admiral said, mildly annoyed at the doctor's suggestion.

"True, but if both of you don't learn to relax, I'm going to have to post a security guard to play referee as the two of you are going to have side-by-side beds in here after a heart attack or something," Cottle muttered, just barely loud enough for Admiral Adama to hear him. "But as you don't appear to be the mood to listen to me," he continued, raising his voice to a normal level, "let me get to the subject at hand. About an hour ago, your son experienced a severe panic attack. Now, he's been resting comfortably for the last ten minutes, but any arguments, even inadvertent ones, would likely lead to another panic attack at this point. I was thinking about releasing him to his quarters after lunch before this but I'm going to wait and see how the afternoon goes."

"Are you saying I can't see my son?"

"No. What I am saying, is that if you do visit with him, choose your words carefully," Cottle replied.

Before either man could say anything, a nurse's voice drew their attention.

"Captain Adama, you're supposed to be resting, sir," a nurse said, holding onto Lee's arm as the two emerged from the curtained off area.

"Then I'll rest in my own bed," Lee replied, shaking off the nurse's hold on him. "I'm not staying here any longer," he added, as he continued to head for the exit.

"Dr. Cottle hasn't given you the okay to leave yet," the nurse persisted, once again reaching for Lee's arm.

Muttering something inaudible, Doc Cottle turned and headed to intercept his fleeing patient. Silently, Admiral Adama followed, intending to allow the medical staff to do their job but wanting to be ready to step in if necessary.

"I don't care," came Lee's reply, avoiding the nurse's grasp as he continued his intended flight.

"Well I do," Cottle informed him as he stepped into the CAG's path. Standing face-to-face with the younger officer, the doctor stayed alert in case his fleeing patient tried to sidestep him. "You have not been released from medbay yet, Captain, and given the fact that less than an hour ago we were giving you oxygen, there is no way I'm letting you walk out of here right now."

"I can't stay here. I feel like the walls are closing in on me," Lee replied.

"Which could very well be an indicator of another panic attack. All the more reason to not let you out of my sight."

"Perhaps a walk would do him good," Admiral Adama said, from his spot off to the side.

"With all due respect, Admiral, this isn't your concern," Cottle replied, without so much as a glance toward William Adama. He had no intention of taking his eyes off Lee for a second. "You may command this ship but in this room, my word is law."

"True," William conceded, not about to try to usurp the doctor's authority. However, he also hoped they could resolve the situation without having to get security involved and seeing the determined glint in his son's eyes he had no doubt that was where this situation was going. "But you know, there is nothing us workaholics hate more than to be cooped up with nothing to do but rest. Perhaps a leisurely walk is just what he needs to calm down," the admiral suggested thinking about the doctor's earlier admission about being ready to release Lee before he had the panic attack.

"You going to baby-sit him?" the gruff old doctor asked, offhandedly.

"I don't need a baby-sitter," Lee interjected.

~_And he was warning me not to say anything that would upset Lee, _~ William thought, even as he replied to the doctor's inquiry. "I'll accompany him, yes. A walk wouldn't hurt me none."

Cottle let out a slow sigh.

"Get me a blood pressure machine, will you," Dr. Cottle said to the nurse who was still hovering behind Lee. With a nod, the nurse walked off to get the requested equipment. "You, sit for a minute," he instructed Lee, pointing to an unused bed nearby. "If your vital signs check out, I'll let you have your walk, seeing as even inmates get exercise periods," he continued.

"Being here is just as bad as being in the brig," Lee muttered, although he did follow the doctor's instructions this time.

The nurse returned and Dr. Cottle quickly checked Lee's vital signs. "Blood pressure is on the high side of what is considered normal but that isn't unexpected," Cottle said, taking the blood pressure cuff off of Lee's arm. "Go ahead. Take your walk, but if you're not back here in an hour, Captain, I won't hesitate to send ships' security out looking for you. Understood?"

"Understood, doctor," Lee replied, slipping down from the edge of the bed.

William could still see the desperation to escape medbay in his son's eyes. Without saying a word, he fell into step beside Lee, as the younger Adama headed for the exit. He really wanted to know what was going through his son's head right now. What was it that Lee was really trying to escape from? As much as most people hated staying in medbay any longer than necessary, William got the feeling that it was more than that this time.

Still, he didn't want to put too much pressure on Lee. William Adama would be the first to admit that he was hardly and expert on his son, but he did know that any attempts at getting Lee to talk right away would only result in him going on the defensive. He needed to give Lee some time to calm down after the encounter that had just transpired back in medbay.

So William Adama silently walked beside Lee, unobtrusively letting his son lead the way. He wasn't really even sure if Lee had a destination in mind, or was simply walking, until he realized they were heading for the Observation Deck. Lee's words about feeling as if the walls were closing in on him, came back to the admiral then. The Observation Deck was probably the place that felt the most open on Galactica and if they had luck on their side, might provide a bit of privacy for the two of them to talk. William was convinced more than ever that he needed to get Lee to talk.

_~Let's just hope I don't cause another fainting spell or panic attack this time around, _~ William thought as he followed Lee onto the observation deck. Seeing that the Observation Deck, a popular spot with the crew since their flight from the colonies began, was surprisingly empty the Admiral spoke briefly with the marine posted outside the room. In times of high demand, the marine was in charge of making sure that no group of people monopolized the Observation Deck.

"The Observation Deck is off limits for all other personnel for the time being, Sergeant."

"Yes, sir," the marine on duty replied.

With that settled, Admiral Adama pushed the hatch shut behind him.

Lee had already headed for the viewport at the front of the room. Beyond the large bay window, the stars dotted the black canvas of space. They were not the same stars that would have been viewable from Caprica, but they had a solace all their own. William stayed where he was, looking past Lee at the stars himself, wishing they could provide him with the words he needed to reach his son. Unfortunately, even as a child he hadn't believed in the 'wishing on a star' notion.

When the silence had gotten to the point where William could no longer endure it, he finished crossing the room. In the silence of the Observation Deck, his boots echoed loudly against the metal plating as he walked. Coming to a stop just behind Lee, Galactica's commanding officer reached out a hand and rested it on his son's shoulder.

"What's on your mind, son?" William asked softly, hoping that the progress that had been made in the early morning hours hadn't been completely lost.

"Quite a few things," Lee replied quietly, though he made no other indication that he was aware of his father's presence. "This isn't exactly the day that I want to be stuck with nothing to do but think."

William pondered his son's word, trying to figure out the importance of today. It wasn't Zak's or Carolanne's birthday. Nor was it the anniversary of Zak's death, as that had passed three months ago. William couldn't think of anything that would make today more significant than any of the others that had passed recently.

"What's so important about today?"

"It's not important," Lee replied quietly, obviously trying to avoid answering the question.

"I think it is," William pressed, his hand still resting on Lee's shoulder. "It's important enough that it's making you distant and my guess is it helped brought on the panic attack earlier."

Lee snorted. "So much for doctor-patient confidentiality."

"Doc was worried I'd say something to cause another one," William explained, hoping to smooth the situation over a bit. He paused, waiting to see if Lee would answer his original question without him asking it again.

It was Lee who finally broke the silence of the Observation Deck.

Turning to face his father, the movement causing William to finally let his hand fall from his son's shoulder, Lee addressed him. "You're going to hate me," he said softly, the tone of his voice as haunted as the expression William saw in his eyes.

"No, I won't," William replied, without hesitation, wondering how his son could possibly get that idea. Even when Lee had avoided him for more than two years after blaming him for Zak's death, he still had never hated his son. "Look Lee. You and I don't exactly always see eye-to-eye. We never have and with some things, probably never will and that's okay. I may get angry over something that you've done or a choice you make but even through the arguments and accusations, the fact is, you're_ my_ _son_ and I'm_ always_ going to love you. That is never going to change."

Lee let out a long sigh as he reached into his pocket and pulled something out. With a trembling hand, he held the item out to his father.

Taking the item from Lee, William found himself looking down at the face of a smiling child, with a pixie face, whose hair was only a few shades too dark to pass as a dirty blonde. William found himself drawn to the child's eyes. They were the same shape and shade as Lee's. Though the rest of her features bore no resemblance to Lee, the eyes left no doubt as to who the child's father was.

"That's my daughter, Laura Jean. She would have been two today," Lee replied, his voice trembling as he said the words.

Lee's daughter. His granddaughter. A granddaughter that had in all likelihood died before he even knew about her.

William was unprepared for the storm of emotions that descended upon him. He felt the pride of being a grandfather. There was a sudden surge of love for the little girl that smiled back at him from the photo. He wondered what she was like, knowing that the only way he would know was through Lee. William also found himself wondering who her mother was. Had Lee married her? Did he also have a daughter-in-law that he hadn't known about? There was also anger there. An anger at Lee for keeping his granddaughter away from him, yes, but also anger at himself for not making more of an effort to reconcile with his own son. The problems between him and Lee were as much his fault as Lee's.

William struggled not to let those emotions show though. There would be time to sort through and deal with his own emotions later. The important thing right now was to give Lee the support he needed. He knew the pain his son had been struggling with on his own for the last six months. Even after three years, the pain of losing Zak was still there. Yes, it had lessened with the passing of time, but he didn't he would ever fully get over that pain. However, he'd at least had twenty-two years of memories to hold on to. Lee didn't have that with his daughter. He couldn't even imagine what it would have been like to lose Zak or Lee at such a young age.

Finally looking up from the photo he held, William sought out his son. Lee had turned away from him and was now standing near the wall. The younger officer, had placed his left forearm against the bulkhead, with his head resting on the arm. The only movement was in Lee's shoulders, indicating to William that his son was crying.

Tucking the picture into a pocket, knowing how precious that item was, William Adama closed the short distance to his son. Reaching out, he physically turned a resisting Lee toward him and pulled him into an embrace.

"Dad, I'm sorry," Lee managed to say, even as he tried to pull away from William. "I should have told about Laura Jean. Rebecca kept telling me that I needed to. That it wasn't fair to anyone to keep her away from you but I just couldn't swallow my pride and then when the Cylons attacked . . . "

"You thought if you continued to keep your secret that you could spare me that pain," William finished for him, hooking his chin over his son's shoulder as he held Lee's stiff body against him.

"I'm sorry. I just wasn't strong enough to swallow my pride back then or to keep you from worrying now. At first it was easy. I kept so focused on the job that I didn't think about who we had lost to the Cylon attack but then things slowed up some and then I couldn't get them out of my thoughts at night and it became easier to keep working than to face everything when I tried to close my eyes."

"You never gave yourself a chance to grieve, Lee," William admonished lightly. "Grief is a heavy burden to bear. I know from experience."

"I didn't want to add to that . . . " Lee whispered. "I'm sorry," he said again, the words muffled this time against William Adama's uniform.

"It's okay. I forgive you," William told him, rubbing his right hand up and down Lee's back. In truth, the anger was still there but William knew it wasn't all Lee's fault. He had made the decisions that had lead to the distance between them, a distance that had started to form when he had left his own family when Lee was eight years old. Lee hadn't been talking to him after Zak's death, so how could he have expected Lee to call him up just to tell him he had a granddaughter. As much as it hurt that he had been shut out, he knew it wasn't all Lee's fault. "We're both to blame for the problems between us. Don't try to shoulder all that responsibility."

William continued to hug his son close, trying to be a source of comfort and support to Lee but not trying to put a stop to the tears. He knew Lee needed this release to begin the healing process. Though he may have been the pillar of strength in the public eye when Zak had died, William had shed quite a few tears over the loss of his son in private. Even three years later, he had cried when he remembered the date of his youngest son's death.

Despite society's notion that men shouldn't cry, his father had taught William that tears were a natural release of emotion and okay. Though always the pillar of strength in their family, Joseph Adama hadn't been ashamed to show tears when tragedy struck. Though he had never been comfortable with shedding tears in public himself, William had never thought of tears as a sign of weakness in anyone.

"I'm here for you, son, no matter what. We'll get you through this," William said softly. Though hurting for his son and the little girl he hadn't had a chance to know, he felt relief that at least he knew what was going on with his son. Though it would take time, he felt confident that he could get Lee through this.

This time he was determined to be the kind of father that both his sons had deserved their entire life.


End file.
